Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Was it ever from God?

Recently, in the past 12 months, I have found myself struggling in this one area of life. One area that I thought would boost me to the next level but I just could not find a way to get to the next level I was looking for. Then, the something happened. Something I had been preparing for, looking, searching, praying for was in my hands. Like a grand prize from "Wheel of Fortune." I prayed and prayed and asked those around me to pray about it. And God had answered my prayers. So I proceeded to attempt to move on to the next level, even though I wasn't even finished with the one I was on. Let me think about that for a second...
What do you mean move on with with closing those doors? What do you mean you wanted to just skip right on to the next thing, without even bothering to finish what you started in the first place. Talk about being impatient. I jumped at the first thing that I thought would help me get pass what I was going through. Hoping it was the answer to moving me forward. Putting my faith in something that was of this world, something I couldn't take with me when I went on to the good ole "Pearly Gates." I put more faith in this job being what would deliver me than I did in God, my own Father, who had never ever forsaken me and had always provided a way out of no way? Really? Looking back, all of these struggles have led me to ask, was it ever from GOD? God's gifts also known as blessings, are effortless victories. What God blesses us with, we do not have to put up a fight to keep it, to hold on to it because HE has ordained it for us.

So, lets back track, prior to the last year, I have had victories that you wouldn't even imagine. 4 years ago, I started on a journey. I trusted Him for it because I knew that no matter what, He would keep me and watch over me as I went about my life making mistakes.
My first mistake, not consulting Him about this major decision. I can't lie, I had a relationship at the time, I knew better than to go without asking Him. But did I??? Nope, I just made my decision and that was final. Once things started going sideways, well, not in the way I thought was "right," I couldn't understand why I was having such a hard time with what I thought was a blessing from God. So I made up in my mind that I had the perfect plan to get out. I was going to just move on with the first opportunity that came. Ha, who was I fooling? I tried it, and I was snatched up within a matter of time. See, one thing I learned and I have had to deal with is, you can't start and not finish out on the journey God has planned for you. Nothing is on my time, it is on GOD's time. Who am I to say when I am done with what He has planned for me? So as I take this next few months to focus on what God's will is for me, I hope to continue to grow in my faith, and in knowing that I must complete my assignment from God before I can move on to the next one. Otherwise, I can be sure that I will lose a battle that isn't mine to fight. What God has for me, it is for me and only me. When He decides it is my time, He will let me know. Until then, I just have to get through this storm and trust that on the other side, He will be waiting to blow my mind. I just have to endure and be patient. It is all a part of the testimony...Lord, your will be done.

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